I believe my mantra for the year was to play and be authentic. I do believe that I am sticking with this as closely as I can. But, on the plane trip home today, I watched a movie that I have been avoiding for some reason. Eat, Pray, Love. I know I read it in bookclub (well almost all of it) and at that time, I found it too spiritual and I was unable to connect with it.
As you all know my life changes and suddenly I connect with it. I decided to give the movie a chance and I am sure I almost turned it off 10 times within the first 45 minutes. It was too close to home in many ways, and I felt like I wasn't ready to deal with those feelings and thoughts. I know my journey is about me dealing with those thoughts and feelings, but living in denile has been working too. As I contiued to watch, I told myself that I would turn it off before the end, as I don't want to know good or bad what happens. My end to my movie hasn't happened yet and I don't want to get any false hopes or potentially see any more sadness come my way. I am not saying I am the lady in the movie by any stretch of the matter, but I did relate to some of the experiences that she faced, minus the spiritual meditation stuff. If you have seen the movie then you will understand when I say "I am a women in search for a word". A word that describes me, my journey, my process. I don't have it yet, but am working on it!
Having had the opportunity to go home for a week, really solidified for me the need to be here in England still. I was feeling not ready to be home. It could have a lot to do with the realization that holy sh** I have a lot to take care of when I get back. It dawned on me that this year of running away from so much drama has begun to change me in small ways. It just doesn't seem like I have reached the full circle quite yet to be ready to come home. (Who knows, this may never happen).
For some of you, I unfortunately didn't get to see you during my whirlwind visit. Please know that I did not intentionally skip anyone. I had no thoughts of going home before the year was up, it wasn't until my brother decided that it was cheaper to fly me home than for him to fly here. My brother gave me the opportunity to come home and surprise my family and friends. There are no words to express the gratitude I have for him giving me this gift!
I am not sure if you have ever pulled off total surprises before, but I hadn't really until this past week. After arriving in Calgary on Wednesday afternoon, I was able to meet up with my friend who I travelled to Italy with. We spent the evening out at my brother and cousin's place. I got my first taste of the new Kinect for Xbox. Wow, that is crackin! I enjoyed making a fool out of myself and watching others do the same. We didn't go to bed till around 330. A good 30 hours of awakeness for me. After 5 long hours of sleep we headed out to my dad's place. I thought surely on an 8 hour drive I would get some sleep, but no, not even a head nod (which for me is very unusal).
We pulled into my dad's place, I walked in towards his office. I heard him in the kitchen, I took out my camera and walked in saying hello! It was great, jaw drop total surprise! Then to surprise Corona, he was the one I was most worried about. But, of course he knew who I was. Jumping, yelping and trying to give me kisses; all the while trying to show me this ham bone he had just been given. (I am pretty sure one of my strict rules was for Corona not to get people food). I guess ham bones win out over getting too excited to see your mom after 7 months. Corona gave me the snub for a little while, but into the evening he began to warm up to me and then like old times not leave my sight. We had a great night visiting, some of my friends came out for a drink. They continually bugged me about having an accent. Which I totally do not! Another late night! The next couple of days at dads was great. Between the food which I missed; chicken wings, fries, liberty burgers and the drinks that I missed; paralyzers, grape sour puss and Canadian Rye, I got my fill of both. I defintaly took advantage of my time there. It was sad to have to leave on the Sunday, as Corona began to whine. I assured him though that I would see him in only a few months.
Next surprise was mom. I was timid walking up to the door. Rod answered and said mom still didn't know. So he called her up the stairs and there I was at the top. She looked like she was seeing things. When I got to the bottom of the stairs she was in tears as she hugged me. I love surprises!
While being back in Medicine Hat, I was able to go to the school where I took a leave from. I surprised many people there and got some great picutures. I was moved when I went to my old class and saw the students. They look great and they seemed geniunely happy to see me. Having the chance to go out for a couple of drinks with some great friends allowed me to soak in some of the love that I had been missing while being here. I am very fortunate to have such a great circle of friends. They play a huge roll in my decision to come back to the Hat by the end of June.
I was honoured when I was asked to be a godmother. For some this isn't all that big of a deal, but for me it is huge. I have a fantastic relationship with my own godmother. Many memories from banana pancakes, going to Calaway Park, watching 2 movies at the theatre on New Year's eve to now enjoying a glass of wine on the deck visiting. My godmother has always been an inspiration to me and I only hope I can be the same to this little one. On another level, it may be the mother role that I have been unable to play. Instead of me continuing to search to fill this hole in my life, maybe this is the "mom" that I was meant to be. It is hard for me to express my appreciation to my friend for asking me to do this, but I know I will do everything I can to make sure that each day she knows how much I appreciate her and her precious daughter!
So back to Thame, time is ticking away. Only a few months, with so many things to do and places to see I have a sick sense that it is going to whiz by.
Thank you to all that made my home visit so meaningful! And I again apoligize to those that I didn't get to see.
Love you all!
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Monday, March 7, 2011
Life Update
Now that I am done bragging about my holidays, I can go into more detail of what has been happening with me. Just for you who want to know more.
My last week at work was hard. Up and down feelings about leaving. I wasn't able to tell the students until Thursday before the end of the day, so it was hard to keep it a secret. I must admit the reaction I got from a few of the boys was just what I needed. It showed me that I did make a difference and that I did have their respect. Friday started with the boys taping me to a chair and chanting that I wasn't allowed to leave. The hugs I got through out the day were so meaningful. I was pleased to end on a positive note. I receieved some great messages from some of the parents expressing their gratitude to me and letting me know their son would miss me. I was deeply touched. At the end of the day, each of the boys gave me a hug (even the one who I had a mishap with). So I can walk away from this challenge feeling satisfied and proud of myself.
My special visitor came and we had a great time together. It didn't go all as planned as it was decided that we are better off as friends. A little hiccup along my journey, but I know that it won't be my last.
As I am sitting here at 12:30 in my pj's on a Monday, I am feeling pretty good. The sun is out and I am happy that I am still here. I am hoping to get some subbing in to give me some income to pay the bills. My plan is to enjoy the next few months before I am home to reality. It looks like I will be making my way back home in June. I am looking forward to it and know that it will come fast. I still have a few more places to explore before then. I promise to keep you all up to date and informed on any next adventures.
I did have my first proper Sunday roast here, it only took me 6 months to have it. Yummy!
My last week at work was hard. Up and down feelings about leaving. I wasn't able to tell the students until Thursday before the end of the day, so it was hard to keep it a secret. I must admit the reaction I got from a few of the boys was just what I needed. It showed me that I did make a difference and that I did have their respect. Friday started with the boys taping me to a chair and chanting that I wasn't allowed to leave. The hugs I got through out the day were so meaningful. I was pleased to end on a positive note. I receieved some great messages from some of the parents expressing their gratitude to me and letting me know their son would miss me. I was deeply touched. At the end of the day, each of the boys gave me a hug (even the one who I had a mishap with). So I can walk away from this challenge feeling satisfied and proud of myself.
My special visitor came and we had a great time together. It didn't go all as planned as it was decided that we are better off as friends. A little hiccup along my journey, but I know that it won't be my last.
As I am sitting here at 12:30 in my pj's on a Monday, I am feeling pretty good. The sun is out and I am happy that I am still here. I am hoping to get some subbing in to give me some income to pay the bills. My plan is to enjoy the next few months before I am home to reality. It looks like I will be making my way back home in June. I am looking forward to it and know that it will come fast. I still have a few more places to explore before then. I promise to keep you all up to date and informed on any next adventures.
I did have my first proper Sunday roast here, it only took me 6 months to have it. Yummy!
Malta and Ireland, ticked off my list of places to see!
Back from holiday! I was fortunate enough to venture to both Malta and Ireland for two weeks. Two very different places, with two different experiences.
I was so pumped to go to Malta to get a little sun, and put away my umbrella. Shorts, bathing suit and sandals packed. Shorts, bathing suit and sandals never left my suitcase! I am glad that I packed for two different climates. Because I was able to wear my warm clothes for Ireland in Malta. I did see the sun for periods of time, and when it was out it was warm. But it rained and was so windy that I wore a coat, scarf and yes even my mitts for a lot of it. It doesn't help either when places don't have heating because it typically doesn't get cold enough for heat. So I froze for almost 6 days straight.
Malta itself is a very nice island, with tons of history. The fortresses that surround the capital Valetta were amazing. The Mediterranean sea did not disappoint, it was so clear, blue and absolutely breathtaking. If it wasn't for the massive waves due to the unsettled weather, I would have loved to get lost in the water for awhile. The many bays on the island were filled with fishing boast, sailboats and a few much bigger ships (Like David Beckham's Yacht). Malta is a melting pot of cultures and so there are many different languages spoken. Every one is taught English in school so it was very easy to communicate with the locals. The nightlife in Malta I can only imagine in the warmer months would be hopping, as many of the clubs were not fully running during this off season. I did manage to find some great pubs that were reasonably priced. Each meal I had was great, except for the first meal at the hotel. I had a lobster ravioli, and well it tasted like I was brushing my teeth. I went on two tours, one was around the coast line of Malta. Wow! So beautiful! (You will have to see some of the pictures) and the other tour was to the Island of Gozo. The ferry ride over was extremely rocky, but I managed to keep my breakfast down. This island was a lot calmer than Malta, and had some breathtaking views. It is a shame that the weather wasn't all that great this day as it made it hard to want to tour all the things that were on the trip. I am not convinced that I would return to Malta again, unless it was during the hot months and all that was on the agenda was eating, drinking and suntanning.
Ireland on the other hand, well, I am pretty sure I could live there! I loved it! It could have to do with the obsession I have now developed for the Irish accent. I couldn't get enough of hearing it. I think the weather gods got messed up because the weather in Ireland was a lot better than it was in Malta. Not hot, but beautifully sunny with no wind and no RAIN!!!!!! I went less times without my coat here! Dublin itself is similar to all big cities. It is busy with tons of traffic and extremely crowded sidewalks. But, it was all good, if I could hear people talk. Not that I understood them half the time, but it was great all the same. The first day seemed like a perfect day to go to the Guinness Storehouse. What an amazing operation, and huge! A little sample in the middle of the tour and then a free pint at the end. I have now become a Guinness fan! The bar at the top offers a 360 degree view of Dublin and with the sun being out, it was great. The technique of pouring a perfect Guinness was strictly followed and was finished off with a clover leaf in the foam. So cute! For the next two days, I enjoyed the hop on hop off bus service. It took and hour and half to go all the way around. I was able to see all the sights that I was interested in first before stopping off. From Christ Church Cathedral to Jameson Whisky Distillery, I can honestly say I made my way around Dublin. The hotel I stayed in offered nightly Irish entertainment, including Irish dancers. It was great to sit back and enjoy a show at the end of a long day. The only downfall to Dublin was how expensive it was. I just about fell out of my chair when I was charged 14 euros for two drinks! This of course was in the most expensive touring spot called Temple Bar. It was at least 11 euros in the less touristy areas. My favourite was the day tour I took through the Wicklow hills and through the Glendalough lakes. Pictures can not describe the beauty of some of these sights. It did remind me of how fortunate I am to live close to the Rockies and to not take for granted the beauty of the scenery there. I felt so blessed though to be in a different place of the world and have the opportunity to admire its greatness.
There are never enough words to describe in detail all that I saw in Malta and in Ireland. I am glad that I am keeping a journal of the things I experience. It is unfortunate that I can't share everything with you, but hopefully through my blog and pictures on facebook you can get a small glimpse of how lucky I have been to travel.
I was so pumped to go to Malta to get a little sun, and put away my umbrella. Shorts, bathing suit and sandals packed. Shorts, bathing suit and sandals never left my suitcase! I am glad that I packed for two different climates. Because I was able to wear my warm clothes for Ireland in Malta. I did see the sun for periods of time, and when it was out it was warm. But it rained and was so windy that I wore a coat, scarf and yes even my mitts for a lot of it. It doesn't help either when places don't have heating because it typically doesn't get cold enough for heat. So I froze for almost 6 days straight.
Malta itself is a very nice island, with tons of history. The fortresses that surround the capital Valetta were amazing. The Mediterranean sea did not disappoint, it was so clear, blue and absolutely breathtaking. If it wasn't for the massive waves due to the unsettled weather, I would have loved to get lost in the water for awhile. The many bays on the island were filled with fishing boast, sailboats and a few much bigger ships (Like David Beckham's Yacht). Malta is a melting pot of cultures and so there are many different languages spoken. Every one is taught English in school so it was very easy to communicate with the locals. The nightlife in Malta I can only imagine in the warmer months would be hopping, as many of the clubs were not fully running during this off season. I did manage to find some great pubs that were reasonably priced. Each meal I had was great, except for the first meal at the hotel. I had a lobster ravioli, and well it tasted like I was brushing my teeth. I went on two tours, one was around the coast line of Malta. Wow! So beautiful! (You will have to see some of the pictures) and the other tour was to the Island of Gozo. The ferry ride over was extremely rocky, but I managed to keep my breakfast down. This island was a lot calmer than Malta, and had some breathtaking views. It is a shame that the weather wasn't all that great this day as it made it hard to want to tour all the things that were on the trip. I am not convinced that I would return to Malta again, unless it was during the hot months and all that was on the agenda was eating, drinking and suntanning.
Ireland on the other hand, well, I am pretty sure I could live there! I loved it! It could have to do with the obsession I have now developed for the Irish accent. I couldn't get enough of hearing it. I think the weather gods got messed up because the weather in Ireland was a lot better than it was in Malta. Not hot, but beautifully sunny with no wind and no RAIN!!!!!! I went less times without my coat here! Dublin itself is similar to all big cities. It is busy with tons of traffic and extremely crowded sidewalks. But, it was all good, if I could hear people talk. Not that I understood them half the time, but it was great all the same. The first day seemed like a perfect day to go to the Guinness Storehouse. What an amazing operation, and huge! A little sample in the middle of the tour and then a free pint at the end. I have now become a Guinness fan! The bar at the top offers a 360 degree view of Dublin and with the sun being out, it was great. The technique of pouring a perfect Guinness was strictly followed and was finished off with a clover leaf in the foam. So cute! For the next two days, I enjoyed the hop on hop off bus service. It took and hour and half to go all the way around. I was able to see all the sights that I was interested in first before stopping off. From Christ Church Cathedral to Jameson Whisky Distillery, I can honestly say I made my way around Dublin. The hotel I stayed in offered nightly Irish entertainment, including Irish dancers. It was great to sit back and enjoy a show at the end of a long day. The only downfall to Dublin was how expensive it was. I just about fell out of my chair when I was charged 14 euros for two drinks! This of course was in the most expensive touring spot called Temple Bar. It was at least 11 euros in the less touristy areas. My favourite was the day tour I took through the Wicklow hills and through the Glendalough lakes. Pictures can not describe the beauty of some of these sights. It did remind me of how fortunate I am to live close to the Rockies and to not take for granted the beauty of the scenery there. I felt so blessed though to be in a different place of the world and have the opportunity to admire its greatness.
There are never enough words to describe in detail all that I saw in Malta and in Ireland. I am glad that I am keeping a journal of the things I experience. It is unfortunate that I can't share everything with you, but hopefully through my blog and pictures on facebook you can get a small glimpse of how lucky I have been to travel.
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